when you see a hot guy in public and you’re like
“blow minds not dicks”
imma blow his mind with how good i blow his dick
people trust me with their children
Because everyone needs this on their blog
still no oscar
when a character u don’t like dies
The entire cast of The Walking Dead.
Of course Brad Pitt helped hand out plates and napkins. Dude’s got 47 kids.
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
when people reblog two part posts in the wrong order
Ellen should win an Oscar for being Ellen
"and the oscar for best ellen degeneres goes to…. ellen degeneres"
"And the oscar for best Leonardo Dicaprio goes to … Ellen Degeneres"
When you still have fries at the bottom of the bag
“hey do you want the rest of my-“
when your friend named ben is gay